Top ten things that happened are….

At ten…had my ROP test yesterday – or eye test for the less medically minded -  and passed with flying colours. So I’m glad. M&D are glad. And the one who saturated me with oxygen for over an hour last week is very glad. Oh there you go I’ve said it. Oops.

At nine…My albublimunin (whatever) levels have increased. I’m on extra iron so at least it seems to be working. No more fat face for me.

At eight….My hemoglobin (hb) levels have decreased which isn’t great. They’ve gone down a bit further than the last blood test so that means I’m on the border of a blood transfusion but the dr seems to be quite obsessed with giving me one (ooo matron) and a big one at that (oh stop it) as it will give me a bit of a boost. New information that leaked out of the bloods yesterday was that I also have immature cells. Well I am only 7 weeks old so what do you expect but that might be the cause of why I’m not creating my own cells at the moment. Mum is tasked with firing many questions at the doc today to establish whether they will get more mature or ave we got a bit of a problem ere then son? Or something like that anyway.

At seven….wish I’d done a top five…

At six…My weight has gone up again. I am now only 60g away from them potentially taking me out of the greenhouse. If they do then I move next door into that room over there. Not that one. That one over…..yes that one. Anyway it’s a funny one really cos all everyone has wanted is for me to move to the LDU (Low dependency unit) – or as I have now named it – Little Dude Unit…but now it might actually be happening it all feels a bit scary. If nothing else who’s going to water the Clematis?

At five…M&D went to St.Marys yesterday to meet the consultant to try and find out why I’m here. Why are we all here? Woah. Deep man. Anyway unsurprisingly they couldn’t really put their finger on any particular reason and ended up saying it could have been two things but the main thing was that whatever it was it was more like an act of God and nothing Mum did or didn’t do. So bless her she was very relieved about that because no matter how many times she was told it wasn’t her fault I think its any mothers natural feeling to blame themselves somehow. But  now she doesn’t need to do that, although I still question the lamb bhuna she had the night before I was born….

At four…erm… I have decided that’s it’s the lights that make me look pale. Right above the greenhouse is a big strip light which is either ON and oh my god it’s bright and the other setting emits a weird yellowy glow that makes everyone in the room look like they’ve got a bad case of jaundice. That combined with the beige blinds over there and theres no hope for anyone to get out of here without a liver transplant and getting signed up for a 12 step programme from alcoholics anonymous….

At three…I had 3 bradis yesterday but lovely non-speaky-the-english-very-well-dad-gets-annoyed-with-nurse said it was because I’d been annoyed all day by eye people and sticky the needle in my heel people so I was bound to be a bit knackered. And she was right I was down to air again when all the crowds left.

At two…latest news update. I was on air all night…… look at me breathing and everything. Quite remarkable. Gold star for me.

At one…and talking of gold stars. Yesterday…The Best Boy in Room award went to…ME!! oh bless, I never expected it, we’re all winners here, really especially you over there whatever your name is, I’d obviously like to thank all the doctors and nurses, the greenhouse manufacturer erm God and oh yes of course M&D who without their input I wouldn’t be here today….. Ruddy Bhuna.